Adderall is a great, great thing.

I want to lift myself up to great new heights but I am feeling smaller than a flea right now. My heart feels light but my mind feels heavy like a rock. It’s beautiful outside. Sometimes I forget how blessed we are human beings to see the great beauty God has bestowed upon us to enjoy. We don’t always need flashy, man-made things to make our live seems precious. Just walk outside and feel the nature.

Hear it breathe. Smell it’s life. Touch it’s heart.

Be apart of it.

Love it.

I crashed into the sun.
My body and mind disintegrated
Into small fragments of words
Trickled onto the grass
And magnetized itself with one another
And rebuilt my body back into existence.
I could hear my finger prints grow back on my hands.
The air’s breathe tastes like grass & fruit preserves
And carries a thick humidity
That would have to be sliced with a knife
Soft and silky
Drenched in bluegreenpinkyellow.
The heart beating in my chest is light
Like sun rays transparent through windows.
I want to evaporate your tears
And stitch your leaky wounds.
I want to smooth your rough edges
And kiss your soul back into reality
Come with me.
Your bluegrey hands and arms stretch towards the sky
And turn into warm orangeyellow.
Grab my hand and we can go.
A  precious place enriched with fertile soil
So our dreams can grow into a reality awaits us.
Where raindrops look like stars
And the air is laced with hope.
Doubt hides and never shows it’s face
And fear dies resting in the cemetery of negativity.
You stand next to me
Your eyes glassy and doe-eyed.
Your lungs fill with a breath of new, green life.
And mine fill with pink freshness of happiness.
We run together to a new world
Our sneakers hitting hard on the pavement
And our voices echoing as the
sun fizzled out at the horizon.
We are ready.

This morning the silky sunrise rays hung over my head through the window. I wanted to be able to burst out into joy and float on happiness drifting away from doubt into a sea of the full expectation that I am getting what I am asking for. What I deserve. My thoughts get heavy with doubt. I have to break away from that. I’m working on feeling more and more gratitude in my heart each day. Some days are harder than others, but I have to believe it in my heart that I am able to free myself from fear, and with that I can be freed into a life of ultimate ease and prosper.

My emotions grow awkwardly, but beautifully like tree branches toward the sky. Uncontrollable; they go where they want. I want to be able to feel and to know that I can change my life; that I can control my life. I’m almost there.

Time for some Gratitude of the Day: I am so thankful for my legs that can walk. I am thankful for my hands, my fingers that help my mind & imagination create the beauty that I want the world to see. My eyes; although I do wear glasses I am thankful that I can see at all. I give thanks for my lips that can kiss and a tongue that can taste; which leads to me being thankful for all of my five senses. Thank you.